End victim blaming
If someone tells you they've been a victim of crime, just say:
"It's not your fault."
Victim blaming causes real harm. It can stop people from seeking support or reporting crime.
Our research found victim blaming often comes from family and friends, and that the first response a victim receives can make or break the recovery.
Crime happens because of criminals - not victims.
What to say
We call on Aotearoa to change the script on victim blaming.
When someone opens up about being affected by crime, they do not need judgement. They need to feel heard and safe.
A good first response can be simple:
"It’s not your fault.”
"I'm sorry this happened to you."
"How can I support you right now?"
You don't need to have all the answers. A calm, supportive response can help someone feel less alone.
What is victim blaming?
Victim blaming is when someone suggests the person harmed by a crime is somehow responsible for what happened.
It can be obvious. It can also be subtle. Often, people don't realise they are doing it.
Victim blaming can sound like:
"It’s your fault. You shouldn’t have put yourself in this situation.”
"Why were you even there?"
"You shouldn't have trusted them."
"Why did you leave something in your car?"
"You should have been more careful."
Victim blaming shifts attention away from the person responsible for the crime and puts it onto the person who was harmed. That is why it is so damaging.
Anyone can be victim blamed
Victim blaming is not limited to one type of crime or one group of people.
Our research found it affects people across genders, ages, communities and crime types.
The research also found harmful stereotypes can intensify victim blaming, especially for Māori, Rainbow and disabled communities.
Anyone can experience victim blaming. And anyone can help end it.
Why do people victim blame?
Victim blaming is often unintentional.
Sometimes people do it to protect themselves from the thought that crime could happen to them or someone they love. Blaming the victim can be a way of trying to make sense of something frightening.
But even when it is not deliberate, the harm is real.
Crime is never the victim's fault
Crime happens because of criminals - not victims.
Victims deserve support, not judgement. Your first response can help someone feel safer to seek support and report the crime.
You can change someone’s life in just 4 words.
Say, “It’s not your fault.”
Victim blaming Key Findings Report
Want to understand the issue in more depth?
Our 2024 research interviewed 31 people in Aotearoa who had experienced victim blaming and discovered five major themes.
